Helping a Teen Navigate Grief and Loss
Adolescence already involves major emotional, physical and social changes. The death of someone important can affect a teen’s identity, relationships, plans and sense of safety.
Some teens express grief openly. Others internalize it or avoid conversations because they do not want to upset their family. Their grief may appear as anger, withdrawal, risk-taking, changes in school performance or a stronger focus on friends and activities.
Respect Their Need for Privacy
Teens often need space, but privacy should not become complete isolation.
Let them know you are available without repeatedly demanding that they talk. Create low-pressure opportunities for conversation during a drive, meal, walk or shared activity.
Be Honest
Provide clear and truthful information about the death and any changes that will affect the teen.
Avoid withholding information in an attempt to protect them. When teenagers discover that adults hid important facts, trust can be damaged.
Listen More Than You Speak
Avoid judging, correcting or immediately offering solutions.
Teens may need someone who can listen to anger, sadness, confusion or silence without trying to change how they feel.
Maintain Reasonable Boundaries
Grief does not remove a teen’s need for structure.
Continue setting clear and reasonable expectations around school, safety, substance use, technology and family responsibilities. Consistent boundaries can provide stability during an unpredictable time.
Model Healthy Coping
Teens watch how adults respond to grief.
It is appropriate to express sadness and emotion. It is also important to demonstrate healthy coping through rest, nutrition, movement, social support and responsible choices.
Encourage Connection and Normal Activities
Support teens in spending time with trusted friends and continuing activities that provide structure, identity and enjoyment.
Having fun does not diminish their relationship with the person who died.
Pay Attention to Concerning Changes
Seek professional help when a teen shows signs of self-harm, suicidal thoughts, dangerous behavior, ongoing substance misuse, severe withdrawal or a major decline in daily functioning.
Call or text 988 for immediate crisis support. Call 911 when there is an immediate threat to safety.